Husbands and wives

So I will start today by first saying I got my meal plan done for a whole month! Yay me now my next organizing project is the boys closets. I will get those sweater organizers and label them for each day and will start planning their outfits for the week. My theory is the easier I make it on me and Matt the better our life will be. Okay now on to my real subject husbands and wives. Really it should say uber DH (dear husband) vent! Sometimes I just want to slap the man silly. I know I have a good husband, definitely not great but good. Don't get me wrong he has many moments of greatness but he's a 7 on a scale of 10. I know I am far from perfect but I give and give and rarely do I feel I receive the same from Matt. At least on the home front. Work is a completely different story. Especially since I have been a stay at home mom since October with my return date to work looming over me, I feel like he is spoiled. When I go back to work I will need my partner in my domestics life back and I am afraid I have enjoyed and embraced my SAHM role so whole heartedly that he has been spoiled into the bliss of forgetting I need his help! So in case you haven't figured it out that was the argument for tonight. It didn't even need to happen, I was fine holding my anxieties of returning to work in. Only because I know if I ask in the thick o lf it he will help me. But tonight I asked him, after we put the kiddos to bed, if when he had time to bring the last of the luggage from our beach trip in. Harmless right? That turns into him stating I always what until midnight to ask him to do stuff and he worked all day and is tired! So what was I suppose to do it was like he was asking me to call bullshit! I start to puff up and point my finger and the next thing I know I said he was being lazy and what is his excuse going to be next week when I "worked" all day too. Then, before he could answer, I ask him if he thinks what I am doing here at home everyday is nothing. Aw that's right I went there, the great being a SAHM is the hardest job in the world. It is hard to be home all day with your kids cleaning the same things over and over. Not speaking to one adult for your entire day, never having a moment to yourself but getting to spend it with the people you created. It's tedious and thankless and you expect your other half to appreciate all that you do. So when it sounds like he doesn't and more so that he doesn't consider what you are doing important, how on earth can he say YOUR the one looking for a fight. Wow I should do this more often already I feel better. Oh I am not opologizing yet, but I am not as pissed as I was when I started. Anyway my big question is this why do we, women, keep score? I mean we are always counting how many times we cleaned this, changed this many diapers. I read this really awesome book called "Babyproofing Your Marriage" and it speaks about just this. I honestly felt I was getting over this and now here we go again. I am asking him when was the last time you _______. insert said chore or parental duty here. I mean really I do want his help but I must admit being supermom makes me feel great too. Why can't I have my came and eat it too? What the hell else are you suppose todo with cake but eat it! So I as I write this I think I need a refresher on my book. But really does it matter? If in this 2 parent household I am the only one doing the leg work what's the point. I can't change him anymore then I can make him read the damn book. Hell read the chapter! I know I can talk to him and discuss the basic princples of the book, but sometimes I just want him to do his part. And thus the vicious circle ensues. Aw husbands and wives, we love one another but sometimes we just can't stand each other and well that's okay. In the almost 11 years I have been with Matt staying mad or disappointed in him just never seems to stick. But the love and appreciation I have for him will forever and always. Damn now I gotta go say sorry. Sent from my iPhone